When we hear “adapting to society,” we often think it means suppressing ourselves to fit in. But in Adlerian Psychology, adaptation is a far more empowering and intentional concept. This article explores how we can face society while staying true to ourselves, through the lens of Adlerian thought. When you feel lonely or out of place, Adler’s philosophy may offer you a new and meaningful perspective.
Why Adaptation Doesn’t Mean Self-Suppression
Although Adlerian Psychology is often said to promote “adapting to society,” it does *not* mean simply obeying social norms or erasing your individuality.
In fact, Adler clearly stated that one should not sacrifice personal freedom or authenticity just to fit in.
In workplaces or schools with unreasonable rules or toxic norms, forcing yourself to conform can be mentally draining. Adlerian Psychology encourages us not to adapt to such environments, but to consider how we can relate to them *as ourselves*.
In other words, real adaptation means developing the strength to stay grounded in your values while cooperating with others in a changing world.
The Myth of Procrustes and the Danger of Conformity
Adler referenced the Greek myth of Procrustes to warn against the dangers of forced conformity.
Procrustes made travelers fit his bed by cutting or stretching their bodies — a metaphor for imposing rigid standards or suppressing individuality.
Even in modern society, norms like “read the room” or “follow the crowd” may hide Procrustean pressure beneath them.
Adlerian Psychology challenges such pressure, aiming instead for a world where people can live as their true selves.
Community Feeling: The Key to True Connection
One of Adlerian Psychology’s core concepts is *Gemeinschaftsgefühl*, or “community feeling.”
This means recognizing your place in a social group, feeling connected to others, and contributing from a place of mutual respect.
For example, when you feel needed by your family, friends, or colleagues, you’re experiencing community feeling — the sense that you matter within a shared space.
Adler’s idea of “community” extends far beyond the present moment. It includes families, local societies, nations, future generations, and even the global environment.
Life is never lived in isolation. We become truly ourselves through our relationships with others.
Adler’s Vision: Staying True While Connecting with Society
Adlerian Psychology envisions a world where individuals are respected *as individuals* while still being connected to society.
Rather than blindly conforming, Adler urges us to choose how we relate to others — with intention and self-respect.
That might mean speaking up in your workplace or school, and engaging in honest dialogue. Even when there’s conflict, the goal is mutual understanding, not avoidance.
“Respect others while staying true to yourself” — this is the foundation of healthy relationships in Adler’s view.
Conclusion
Adlerian Psychology is not about molding yourself to fit others.
It’s about finding your place in society by staying authentic, recognizing your role in the group, and contributing in a way that honors both yourself and others.
“Change yourself, and the world changes too.” Believing in that power is the first step toward a life that’s both happy and true to you.
*All images used in this article were generated with Midjourney.*
